A lot of accidents are reported to have been caused by distracted driving. There are also plenty of laws that prohibit distracted driving with varying punishments. However, there are times when we just can’t avoid being distracted because a friend is crossing the street and you want to say “hi” or there’s a call from your boss that’s so important you can’t wait to pull over.
At some point, every driver has been distracted. Mostly by sheer luck, people have narrowly avoided getting into an accident. Frequently, the distractions are caused by the latest in technologies available to mankind.
There are many accidents that have happened for pretty much the queerest reasons. One case was of an 18-year old girl who was Snapchatting her speed (at 113 mph) while driving home from work with her friends. She eventually came to an abrupt stop when she ended up crashing her dad’s Mercedes Benz C230 into a Mitsubishi Outlander causing serious injuries to the latter’s driver. Snapchat has been sued because of the said incident and it has “discouraged its users from using the speed filter while driving.”
Another incident involves a 58-year old man in Detroit who crashed his 1996 Toyota while watching porn on his cell phone. Apparently, the man was wearing neither his pants nor his seatbelt and unfortunately died on the scene. The cause of death may cause us to laugh but death is a serious matter and thus we must take traffic laws seriously to avoid any untoward incident. Despite warnings from the government and by automakers on the hazard of using a cellular phone while driving, there has always been a steady increase of accidents involving cellular phones.
But how can one resist the temptation of posting your road trips on Snapchat or how badly you need to satisfy your sexual desires, right? Well, one solution courtesy of our beloved automakers to avoid distracted driving incidents is for autonomous or self-driving cars to be made available to the public. Yes, that’s right. The only way for those who are easily distracted while driving is by owning an autonomous car. Imagine all the possibilities that you can do inside these mobile living rooms.
For the executive director of The Canadian Automated Vehicles Centre of Excellence Barrie Kirk, the most enticing idea that would make people want to own an autonomous car is to make babies. Sounds funny but it’s actually quite practical. Many classic coming-of-age movies have had plots of losing one’s V-card in the backseat and if Kirk is right, autonomous cars would surely be a big hit.
There’s no need for a lookout and no need to wait ‘til you get to the motel ‘round the corner, you can do your business while inside the moving vehicle. It is as illegal for people to have their sex escapades behind the wheel as it is to use your mobile phone while driving; however, autonomous cars get you off the hook. Autonomous cars are built so that everyone inside the car can take their hands off the wheel and eyes off the road thus all the more free time to do whatever you want to make out with your partner.
The thing is, autonomous cars may soon become heavily tinted private sex chambers and will soon cater to the growing need of a sex-deprived populace. Even if the current and most advanced software are semi-autonomous, humans are resourceful by nature and will make use of any free time whenever, wherever. But while these cars are still under production, let’s all just try to keep our hands on the wheel and eyes on the road to avoid any accidents, alright? For now, just keep your hands to yourself while you can and pull over when you just can’t resist temptation.